Bailey's Prize 2017 Series: First Love by Gwendoline Riley

This is the second review from the Bailey's Women's Prize for Fiction shortlist for 2017. You can find other reviews here.

 

I am not sure where to begin, so I will begin with the synopsis of the book from Goodreads: From “one of Britain’s most original young writers” (The Observer), a blistering account of a marriage in crisis and a portrait of a woman caught between withdrawal and self-assertion, depression and rage.

Neve, the novel’s acutely intelligent narrator, is beset by financial anxiety and isolation, but can’t quite manage to extricate herself from her volatile partner, Edwyn. Told with emotional remove and bracing clarity, First Love is an account of the relationship between two catastrophically ill-suited people walking a precarious line between relative calm and explosive confrontation.

I really wanted to like the book, and some parts I did. It's raw, so much so that you feel weirdly disturbed while you're reading the book - that was the way it was for me. The thing about first-person narratives, especially in this genre, is that they can be unreliable. But we don't know.

Neve, the narrator (who herself is a writer, prior to meeting Edwyn), recounts various events and people from her life - previous partners, her needy mother, her abusive (to her mother) and greedy father and of course Edwyn. What I thought was that Neve suffers from depression - which feeds into and from her toxic relationship with Edwyn. Edwyn, is quite simply, emotionally abusiv.

There was one instance in their past where Neve got so drunk she threw up over herself. Edwyn uses this to keep putting her down - telling her not to return home drunk when she goes out with her friends. The book ends with Neve finally standing up for herself - sort of. As is in toxic relationships usually, this does not last long.

The novel is realistic, certainly. Riley's characters are well fleshed out, painfully honest and often irritating. I feel like this is one of the issues I faced - I could not find a character to root for or identify with. Riley's writing is what makes the book worth reading, although at certain points I found them stuffy (Neve's mother's never-ending rambles). And for the most part the novel felt extremely British - if that makes any sense to you.

However, do not let what I thought hold you back from reading this book. A book is like a glove - if it doesn't fit one, it will fit another.

If you have read the book or wish to, do leave your thoughts below in the comments!